Why do some people interpret the same situation as stressful, while others do not?
Why do some people feel anger in certain circumstances, but not in others? The same applies to fear and sadness.
What is the difference between them?
If we continue under the premise that the interpretation of reality comes from within, and not from outside, it makes sense that the person whose reaction is based on anger, for example, is someone who, since childhood, has been surrounded by people and situations where this was the predominant emotion, and therefore, it is the one that "triggers" them in different circumstances.
Let's take as an example a person who, after 10 years on the job, was fired without warning. How might people react differently?
- For a person whose predominant emotion is fear, the automatic reaction would be anxiety, stress, distress. "What am I going to do now?", "How am I going to get a job like that?", "I won't be able to pay the bills."
- For a person whose predominant emotion is anger, the reaction would be retaliation, arguing with the employer, blaming the company and its owner, speaking ill of the company and those who work there. Resentment. Anger. Wanting revenge.
- For someone whose childhood was surrounded by love and security, the reaction would be one of understanding, gratitude, good wishes for the company, and humility in recognizing areas for improvement. This person knows that opportunities are everywhere. "Thanks to the experience and what I learned in this job, it will be much easier to find another one."
That being the case, asking ourselves the question: How do I usually react to complicated situations? can be the starting point for getting to know and understand ourselves better.
Reality is a mirror, and situations that "trigger " "negative" emotionsin us are only reflecting back to us the parts of ourselves that are wounded and need healing.
Otherwise, why would one person be able to face the same situation calmly, while we respond to it with fear, stress, and anger?
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