Continuing with the topic of managing "negative" emotions, if we put into practice what we discussed last week, we have probably seen how, by removing our resistance to what we feel—even if it is uncomfortable—and accepting it, we feel better much faster than when we try to fight or avoid it.
When we are faced with a problem or a situation that we do not know how to solve, or where the solution we see may bring more conflict, keeping this in mind is key. Why? Because you cannot reach a solution from the same level—or emotion—from which the problem was created.
You cannot solve frustration from frustration.
You cannot resolve anger from anger.
When we are faced with a complicated situation, we are accustomed to acting and seeking to change what is happening in our environment to calm ourselves and feel better. What happens if we change the equation?
If, instead of acting from the emotion that the problem is generating in me—whether it be anger, fear, frustration, stress, distress, or anxiety— I take a moment and focus on the sensation in my body—whether it's a knot in my stomach, tension in my neck or back, pressure in my chest, etc.—rather than on my thoughts, accepting and welcoming it, even if it feels uncomfortable, we will feel it diminish, and in a matter of minutes we will begin to feel calmer.
When we are immersed in "negative" emotions, our mind is filled with thoughts to the point of bewilderment. We cannot see clearly. When we focus on the body, our mind calms down because the brain cannot do both things at the same time.
Only by having a calmer mind will we feel better and with more clarity. As a result, our decisions will be wiser and more accurate.
Once we do this, better solutions will come to mind, because we tend to see the world through the lens of what we are feeling at the moment.
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